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rmbdntmsswthme
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PostSubject: the plague   Tue Apr 22, 2008 3:09 pm

A while back, I had a dream, so I started a story based on that dream. I thought I'd post it here for you guys to read, and I don't care what if what you tell me is negative, just give me some feedback. I'll post more once I get chapter 2 finished.

The Plague
Prologue

"Eight and twothousand years after the death of the saviour, the race of man shall fall to the sins of one. only the seven shall remain."-anchient sanscript prophacy, the influence behind this book.

April 18th, 2038. The day this nightmare started. April 24th, 2038. That’s when my life changed forever. As I sleep, I watch. And remember.

Where the plague started, nobody really knew. Somewhere in California is my guess. All I know is it swept east and fast. In exactly one week, it covered all of North America. In one week! I lost my family in that week. I lost every thing. But I gained a great power.

To understand my power, you must first understand its origins. In Alchemy there are seven basic elements: Earth, Air, Fire, Water, Darkness, Light, and Spirit. I was born a Shadowslinger, or a Darkness Elemental. My powers didn’t start to mature until my sixteenth birthday, 4/24/38, the day I lost everything.

Chapter one: beginnings

Some time around noon, I retreated to my room to meditate, in order to harmonize myself with my element. Once I was deep within the meditative trance, a strange feeling swept over me. A feeling of utmost dread. If I broke my concentration to investigate, my progress would be lost, and I would not receive another window in which to receive my endowment. Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling everything was about to change. Sweeping aside my ominous feelings, I dug deeper. The deeper I burrowed, the stronger my powers grew. Subconsciously I built a barrier of churning darkness to protect my fragile human body as I matured into a true elemental. Though I was stationary, the world was not. Roughly five hours passed as I became one with the darkness, five long hours. As I awoke, the barrier slowly receded, unveiling me to be a new man. My physical characteristics, long, black-brown hair, tall, stocky build, and pale skin, stayed the same, yet I was different. The difference was I could sense stuff. I knew there was a pair of creatures behind me, right outside my doorway.

As I rose, I saw them. Two huge, hulking, demonic creatures, they looked somewhat human, but completely deformed. Their bones stuck out at odd angles, and their skin was torn and sick looking. They had their backs to me, feasting on some type of meat. The largest creature viciously tore what appeared to be the leg of a large toddler off of his meal, crushing the bone with a loud crack.
“No, Joey…” I moaned, forcing the vomit rising in my throat back down to my stomach. The smaller creature paused, listening. It smacked the larger and grunted while making hand movements, seeming to communicate. The larger also stopped, listening. They both dropped their meals, turning. The smaller creature had been eating what appeared to be a small toddler.
“Not Aaron... No. No!!” I groaned as my stomach contents forced their way through my teeth, causing me to double over in pain. Shakily I raised my arms to defend myself, fighting to keep on my feet as they charged me. Barreling towards me on all fours, they kept slamming into one another, fighting to be the first to me. Right as the first creature reached me, its shadow wrapped around its arms, pulling it, causing the beast to fall and roll forward. The second creature tripped over the first, piling onto it. Their shadows then cocooned them, tightening until the sound of cracking bones could be heard, followed by the screams of the beasts. Squeezing ever tighter, their shadows released and then redoubled, compacting the mass of the beasts until, with a loud squishing sound, the shadows collapsed, returning to ambient darkness.

As I fought the disorientation that threatened to overcome me, I stumbled into my sister’s room, smelling blood. Her constricted corpse was slowly being consumed by her sheet, animated by the skin cells in its fabric. I grabbed a can of lighter fluid and covered the sheet and her room. I lit a ball of paper and threw it into the puddles of accelerant, sending the room up in a blaze. With the fire to my back, i shouldered my black trench coat and stumbled out into the night.

Chapter two: savior

Through the waves of disorientation I struggled to find a way out of this nightmare by instinctively running towards the woods, my only safe haven. The trees were turning and twisting in the still night air. By the time I realized that the trees were moving, I was deep in the forest, running toward the mountaintops, toward freedom. I was sprinting down a ravine when the trees started to mutate around me, reaching for me, groping for me. I tripped forward, rolling into a large rock. Ignoring the pain, I forced myself to rise, grunting as a sharp twinge sped through my body. I stumbled, clutching my side, frantic with fear, pain, confusion, and anger, regressing deeper and deeper into my instincts, becoming more primal with each passing moment. Eventually, the darkness adapted my body, raising my true form from the depths of my D.N.A. My hair grew, my face stretched, my muscles bulged, my limbs changed. My knuckles popped, expanding as my bones thinned and lengthened, my legs twisted and turned in on themselves until they resembled the hind legs of some massive beast. My feet morphed into padded paws, similar to a Saint Bernard’s. My massive new jaws filled with large, destructive teeth. My claws, no longer human fingers, dug into the soft peat, adding traction to my blindingly fast dash. The tattered remains of my shirt fell off my skin, now covered in a fine fur. Letting loose a tremendous howl, I powered away from the demonic trees, toward the mountain top, toward the moonlight.


Feeling the moonlight wash over me had a calming effect as I came to a stop at the peak of the small mountain. I turned, searching for someone, anyone. As my eyes came to rest on my burning home, I felt a twinge of pain in my heart.
The pain worsened as I thought of the countless loved ones I had lost to these beasts. Joey, Aaron, Tonya, Mother, my dad, Amanda, Matt… I cried out in a howl of pain, raising my snout to the sky. I cried for all my lost loved ones, and all the lost souls consumed by these eradicators, these exterminators, hunting down all life on this earth. As I turned into a more human creature, the howl turned into a scream. My jaws retracted, popping audibly, and my head returned to its egg-like shape. My muscles retracted to a size close to their original size, but much denser. My claws turned to long nails, and my legs twisted and snapped into their original shapes, turning my feet into some paw-foot hybrid. My nose was larger and jutted more than normally, and my ear tips stayed pointed, resembling those of an elf. I collapsed on a rock, folding into a sitting position similar to a marionette without strings. I ran my hands through my unusually long hair, shaking with fear and exhaustion. Finally, I gave in to the sleep, and curled up into a ball on the rock, protected from the cold by my fur. As I slept, a winged shadow passed over my sleeping form, circling the clearing.


Chapter Three: reunion

The dream I was in seemed weird, almost unimaginable. Demonic creatures had killed everyone, including my family, and when I had run away, I became a sort of werewolf, loping on all fours headed for the top of a mountain. The thought of that made me chuckle in my mind. Everyone knows there is no such thing as a werewolf, mutant or otherwise. I was still chuckling when I was shaken awake by a giant bird.

The shape loomed over me, not a large bird as I had first thought, but a mutated creature.
“Richard! Richard! Wake up, you idiot!” It yelled at me as it shook me fiercely.
“Mat,” I grunted groggily, puzzled as to why he was in my room, “Whatsgoingon?” He ignored my slurred speech and continued to shake me.
“The world’s gone to hell and you’re sleeping on a rock?!” he yelled at me. I suddenly shot up off the rock. The dream was real. They were really all dead.
“No, Nooooo!!!” I screamed, falling to my knees. I kneeled there, head down, shaking from dry sobs, not one tear left for me to cry.
Mat placed a reassuring talon on my shoulder. For the first time, I actually looked at him. His body was covered in a fine down, and his face crested amidst a ring of back-swept feathers. Hs hands, now talons, hung from arms longer than his legs. Massive wings sprouted from his back, giving him an angelic facade. A tail sprouted from the small of his back, doubling his overall length.

As I rose, His features started changing again, becoming more human.
His talons split, shifting from a pair of cloven claws to a pair of long-nailed hands. His neck shrunk to a more human proportion while his tail slid into his back with an audible “Plop!” His body was still feathered, and his shorts clung to his waist by a thread. He shuffled nervously as I stood there, staring in the direction of the ruins of my house, no longer visible past the endless sea of mutant trees, wings popping as they returned to his shoulder blades.
“Let’s go,’ I said, hoarse from all my tears, turning around in the opposite direction, facing “Polecat Holler”, the road across the mountain. A familiar scent reached my nose as I stood there.
“Kassi,” I said as I started to run down the mountain. “Mat, Kassi’s still alive! There may be others, look for them!”

I grinned as the changes began, quicker this time. Seconds later I was loping on all fours with Mat flying above me. I nodded my lupine head, signaling him to branch off from me. Smelling the stench of fear around her scent, I redoubled my efforts to reach Kassi, before it was too late. Digging my claws into the soft soil, I powered my way in between the mutant trees, sprinting toward Kassi’s house, hoping that it wasn’t too late.


Chapter Four: Fear

The screams reached my ears as I neared the rural road leading toward Kassi’s house. Scrabbling for purchase as I turned on the gravel, I rushed toward her door.
“No, No!” I heard Kassi scream as I broke through the door. A quick survey of my surroundings told me that she was to the left of me, in a sort of dining/living room. I turned to face them as her mother screamed, apparently at seeing me.
“Not another one!” she yelled, staring at me from her place in front of Kassi. I leapt at the creature that was attacking them; flying with my left claw cocked, ready to rend flesh from bone. The creature had only enough time to register the sound of my roar before I tore the front of its head off, leaving a gaping hole from ear to ear. Shadows sprouted from my wrist, removing the flesh that had come into contact with the creature, exposing the bone. Before the pain could reach my brain, the darkness wrapped my hand in darkness and rebuilt the flesh, leaving it good as new. I started to revert to my previous form as Kassi and her mother stared in disbelief.
“Kassi,” I said, trying to sound human, “It’s me, Richard. Don’t be afraid. I haven’t been infected. I don’t even think I can.”
“R-richard?” Kassi stuttered, “What happened to you? Are you okay?”
“I don’t know, but it’s happened to Mat, too.” I sighed, squatting against the wall to the left of her. There was one thing that was bothering me. A certain smell, one I associated to the creatures. As I looked toward Kassi’s mom, it clicked in my brain, like a puzzle falling into place.
“Excuse me, Mrs. Pickens?” I called, causing her to jerk toward me, as if seeing me for the first time, “That thing didn’t touch you, did it?”
“Um, uh, um,” she stuttered, holding her arm, “I-I don’t kn-know what your talking about.” She sat in the corner shifting her eyes from point to point around the room, twitching like a caged rat. Kassi looked back and forth from her mother to me, whimpering louder with each glance.
“She was,” Kassi blurted out, fear rising in her throat, “It touched her arm. What is going to happen to her?”
“If I’m correct, she’s already been infected and she will be turning soon.” I said, staring at my feet, avoiding their gaze, “There’s nothing you can do now, Kassi. She’s going to become one of them. I’m sorry.”
“No, “She said, “I won’t let her. I’ll stop it.” Kassi lunged forward, grabbing at her mother, trying to reach the wound.
“No, I growled, appearing between them, “If you touch her, you will become one of them. I won’t let that happen. I can’t loose anyone else; you and Mat are all I have left. I will not lose you two or let you two go.”
Kassi’s mom looked at Kassi, a deep sorrow in her eyes. “You have to go,” she told Kassi, “You have to survive. Please, for my sake and the sake of the other victims of this horrible disease.” She turned her eyes to me. “Please watch over her and keep her safe.”
She groaned as a new set of spikes sprouted from her arm. As I led Kassi out, I created a blade out of the shadows and left it for her mother. I felt her plunge the blade into her chest after Kassi and I had exited the house, feeling guilt and sorrow.Changing, I turned to Kassi.
“Climb on,” I growled, “And hold on tight. We have to move quickly.”
Adrenaline poured through my system as I ascended the hill back into the woods, carrying Kassi to safety.

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GRARG.


Last edited by rmbdntmsswthme on Mon May 05, 2008 6:27 am; edited 2 times in total
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PostSubject: Re: the plague   Wed Apr 23, 2008 2:12 am

Why should we give you negative? Seems like a great beginning of a great story.
Smile
I wonder what will happen next... Go on, and good luck in writing!

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PostSubject: the plague   Wed Apr 23, 2008 8:00 am

It's not negative so keep on writing good luck on your writing.

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But today I've decided to tell you that I'm a,
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rmbdntmsswthme
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PostSubject: Re: the plague   Mon May 05, 2008 6:27 am

Chapter five: survival.

I took her back to a cave i used for my alchemic formulas, sealing the door with a five prong seal.
"stay here, stay safe."i said, my body already returning to it's lupine true form.
"Where are you going?" she asked, horror filling her face.
"To search for more survivors." I turned, facing the door, when a pink septacostappeared, opening a doorway.
"Lucian?" the voice inside asked timidly.
"A-aleena?" i stuttered, confusion permeating my features.
"Oh, it is you!" the light birthed a girl, who wrapped her arms around my neck.
"How?" was the only word i could manage as i held her, tears of joy streaking down my face.
"I used your picture from Gaia. I told you i was a Spiritualist, didn't I?" tears fell fron her eyes as she burried her face in my chest. Her waist length auburn hair partially hid her small, round face, and her blouse was torn and bloody. I lifted a strand up, a concerned look on my face.
"Oh, it's not mine." she said, looking at the skimpy remains of her blouse.
"Oh!" she said, covering herself, causing me to smile.
"it's okay, 'Leena. Hey, i'd like you to meet Kassi. she's one of my friends from before..." Kassi smiled, waving.
"here." i removed my trench, draping it over Aleena's shoulders as Mat alighted, carrying his girlfriend, Ashley McQuain, and Kassi's boyfriend, Matthew Hinkle. "there's got to be more survivors" i said, turning to the opening,
"we need one more human body to cocoon, anyway." i tore out of the cave, into the woods, dissapearing from sight.
{edit}
"Cocoon?" Kassi asked, looking puzzled. As i ran, i followed the scent of the only human i could smell. Bud was hiding in an old tanker truck that had been rusting at the old iron mill, surrounded by creatures. I leapt, roaring, toward them. I turned the creatures heads around, planting my rear claws into the third one's throat. darkness removed then healed the infected areas as i returned to my somewhat human form.
"Leo, come on. we have to go." i told him, holding out a hand.
"S-sure." he climbed out and took a hold of my hand. I cradled him in my arms like a child and leapt from building to building toward the forest.

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GRARG.


Last edited by rmbdntmsswthme on Wed May 14, 2008 6:23 am; edited 2 times in total
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PostSubject: the plague   Mon May 05, 2008 8:55 am

Sure! I'll be waiting

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PostSubject: Re: the plague   Sat May 10, 2008 12:00 am

I'm not really good at rating it but it sounds nice. Puyu-chan enjoyed it alot both of us think its not negative but creative indeed.
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PostSubject: Re: the plague   Mon May 12, 2008 4:48 am

Respect. And - once more - look at your rating! It increased, and also increased your Digimon experience. And - once more - You`ve got some rewards!

+100 personal experience
+50 Digimon Digivolving experience
+Digiegg of Bravery

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PostSubject: Re: the plague   Wed May 14, 2008 6:25 am

Chapter Six: Sleep.

I returned, still carrying Leo, who had fallen asleep in my arms. Even though he was a year older than i was, he looked small and frail.
"I swear i will always protect you." i said, holding him closer.(more to come, the bell just rang.)

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PostSubject: Re: the plague   Sun May 18, 2008 3:49 am

That was really short chapter.
Smile
Well, we are waiting!
Wink

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PostSubject: the plague   Sun May 18, 2008 9:51 am

I will wait too!

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PostSubject: Re: the plague   Tue Oct 21, 2008 8:23 am

(chapter six continued)
He curled up in my arms, drifting into a nervous sleep as i almost glided across the woods, protecting him from harm. l dropped down from a nearby rock outcropping, sliding into the ruins. Almost as soon as i set him down, Aleena was upon me, hanging from my neck, kissing me with such ferocity that i was taken aback.
"L-leena!" i stuttered, astounded.
"I missed you." she said, shrugging.

I set her down, turning to Mat.
"Set the seal." i said to him, gathering Matt and Kassi from a dark corner. Mat swiftly set an alchemical seal around a six-pointed star. I woke Leo, directing him to a corner. i set Kassi and Matt on two more, and Mat placed Ashley on the fourth. Mat and i sat across from each other on the top and bottom points. Aleena sat in the middle, and Kassi and the other sat at their points. Mat, Aleena, and I started to chant in Gaelic, an aura of darkness and light swirling around the circle, becoming a large cocoon. I slid next to Aleena, holding her as i drifted toward a deep sleep.
"See you in 500 years." i mumbled, blacking out.

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